At 16, I began writing poetry and journaling, though I was too embarrassed to share it with anyone. There were many things I was self-conscious about—like not having the "right" clothes, and especially the acne on my face. I felt that I was very ugly and didn’t like speaking to girls or people I didn’t know. I was ashamed of how I looked and hated my acne – hated my face. Writing was a place I could be me without judgment, a place I was free in a time where I was otherwise wanting to hide.
I often walked at night and there was a string of parks near my house where I could weave through quiet paths breathing in the cool air along ponds and streams, crossing the occasional road before tucking back into the trees. Lamp posts along the path cast light into the shadows and I would regularly see racoons, skunks, muskrats and beavers. Finally I reached a sheltered area with benches and a light where I could sit and write, even if it was raining.
It was here where I met someone I first shared my poetry with. Her name was Dani and she was someone who liked to walk at night and write as well. She wondered what I was writing. I told her it was poetry but that I wasn’t very good. She wanted to hear it anyway. I was nervous, sweating, and fumbling with my words, but somehow, I got it out. She liked what I wrote and shared some of her writing as well. It felt like someone had finally seen me, not just the person I was but the person I was becoming, the one learning to express my thoughts and feelings, who felt the weight of things and not always a clear path forward.
Writing offers many benefits. It sharpens thinking, requiring us to structure our thoughts and communicate clearly. It helps us process difficult life experiences and emotions. Over time, writing has been shown to improve our immune system, lower blood pressure, and elevate mood, enhancing psychological well-being. Research also suggests that writing can help us accept rather than judge our mental experiences, while boosting focus, flow, and confidence.
For me, writing poetry, stories and journaling became a lifeline through heartache, grief, sadness, self-doubt, as well as joy and accomplishments. It helped me make sense of my world, or at least scream and cry in a place that felt safe to do so. I came to long for and really rely on a time to catch up with myself, writing reflections on what was happening in my life and what was coming up in the days and weeks ahead.
It was my first real period where I set goals for myself, making to do lists and crossing things out. I tried to sort out how I was feeling with everything going on and would make a plan for where I wanted things to go next. Writing was cathartic. No matter how bad I felt, I always felt a little better once I had written things out.
Writing remains an important outlet for me, and I encourage my clients to try it as well. Even when things are difficult—perhaps especially then—writing can serve as a record of where you are in life. Each time you write, you measure your progress on your goals, check in with yourself and offer an honest account of how you are doing.
It is a practice that requires bringing mindful awareness to your emotions, thoughts, motivations, behaviours, beliefs and values. This increased self awareness has been linked to better decision making, improved relationships, fewer depression episodes, and reduced PTSD symptoms.
I often tell clients to watch for downward spirals and instead focus on gradual, upward progress. Don’t try to change everything at once. Take small, consistent, sustainable steps forward. Writing allows you to track this progress, to look back and see just how far you've come. Lasting change often arises from living in alignment with your values. The habits and practices you develop create a life that better reflects those values.
Change isn’t easy, and writing is a space where you can vent your frustrations, anger, and disappointments. At the same time, it’s important to make writing a place where you aspire to positive change, where you feel motivated to take small steps toward your goals.
I encourage you to try writing. You can use any device, but I recommend using a pen and paper to make it a screen-free time, free from distractions.
Start small. Write down three things you're grateful for each day. Make it a gratitude practice. Over time, you'll notice a shift in focus—from feeling like you're lacking to recognizing the gifts already present in your life.
Another simple exercise is to make pros and cons lists when you're facing decisions. Seeing things laid out visually can help clarify your thoughts.
Or, try writing for 10 minutes about a problem or challenge. Write freely, without editing as you go. Let your thoughts flow, and review them afterward. Start to look for patterns in your emotions and thoughts.
Whatever form of writing you choose, I truly believe it will help you become more in tune with your inner world. It provides a way to process the past, reflect on your current state, and create goals for the direction you want your life to move into.
Chris Hellewell MSW RSW, is a social worker and therapist who spent a good deal of his career on the Downtown Eastside of Vancouver and now focuses his therapy work on folks who have experienced complex trauma. He loves working with clients to find their own voice, whether through writing or other Narrative therapy processes.
If you would like to journey further into writing for your mental health, reach out to us today to begin your counselling journey. info@emotionwise.ca
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